Suffering From Post Vacation Stress Disorder

View in Italy

For an entire month my family and I lived, traveled and ate our way through Italy.  We picked herbs from our garden, painted watercolors during the hot afternoons, swam in the pristine lake, ate endless amounts of fresh pasta and gelato, and drove all over the country in a quest to open up our daughters’ eyes and minds as well as their taste buds.  You’d think after an entire month away we would be ready to come home, but you’d be wrong.

However, they call it vacation for a reason right?  It’s a break, a time away, and in the end real life beckons – and there is no more real life than life in New York City.  With barely enough time to recover from jetlag both my daughters went off to day camp, worried about which swim group they’d be in and anxious about coming to camp mid-session.  My husband went off to a new job, literally went off on the train to Washington DC to have his own orientation and new “real life.”  And me?  Well, after writing everyday for a month straight I took a week’s hiatus to get my home back in order.  Plus, after writing in hotel rooms, basil scented gardens and in the sunroom of an Italian villa, I was not ready to go back to windowless back room at Cosi.

At first the alone time was actually nice.  After being together as a family for 33 straight days and nights we all needed a break.  But then the other stuff seeped in.  We had sublet our apartment while we were gone and now I had to put everything back together again, and find all of the things we swore we’d stowed away in places where we’d never forget.  Where were the checkbooks?  The metrocards?  The girls’ diaries?  All of those camp clothes I’d put away so they’d be easy to get to upon our return?  We put Old Mother Hubbard to shame with our bare cupboards and still, after going to the grocery store 3 times in one week I will reach for something – ketchup maybe? – and discover it’s not there because I forgot to put that on the list.  Then came the emails about the new school year, the pending political decisions being made, gossip and a months worth of catalogs and snail mail piled up on the table too!   (What I need on the shopping list is some wine!)

In the end of course it’s worth it.  Nothing can compare to going away – far away – for a length of time.  We were beyond lucky to have had the opportunity and I don’t know when we’ll have it again.  But for once it would be nice if the vacation could spill over into our life at home.  Maybe I’ll buy a pot of basil for our windowsill so at least I can close my eyes and inhale and pretend that outside my window is a field of sunflowers, instead of a pigeon family and the glow of my neighbor’s big screen TV.

This post has been nationally syndicated by McClatchy/Tribune.  Look for it on the web!

Day 7 – Arrivederci Venice, Ciao Florence! (And the discovery of Nutella)

parting shot of venice

parting shot of venice

We ended our stay in Venice with breakfast at the hotel, and the waitress’s delight in plying our daughters with extra containers full of Nutella.  They had never had it before, but I’m sure it will be an instant addition to their European culinary adventures.  We tried to tell them that its just not the same in the US, and it really isn’t, but they didn’t believe us.   And so it goes.  The girls have expanded their eating repertoire since we’ve been here and that’s been great to see.  Izzy, the fish and fruitatarian has started eating meat sauce of all things, and they’ve both added clams and mussels to their list of foods they love.  So maybe the food in Venice wasn’t so bad after all.

heading back to tronchetto

heading back to tronchetto

We left Venice with a sigh, though we definitely felt sated.  I don’t know if we just breeze through things too quickly or what, but I have no idea why someone would tell you to spend 4 days in Venice.  Especially if you’re a New Yorker and used to walking, there is no way you need that kind of time.  So, we headed back to the Autostrada fully satisfied with our stay and looking forward to Florence.  The girls looked forward to watching Tom and Jerry in the car.

marlin says goodbye venice

We had a great ride through Emilia Romagna and then Tuscany; through mountains and vineyards, farms and fields all great until we hit Florence and both the hotel’s directions and the GPS failed us completely (again)… Continue reading

Day 6 – Venice, Venice and more Venice (the tourist throngs cannot spoil this town)

We awoke to cloudy skies and a very decent hotel breakfast.  Even though it looked like rain, and did start to drizzle, the clouds were a welcome sight after so much unrelenting sun and heat.  We had a very ambitious day trying to fit in everything.  We started at a mask making shop called Papier Mache, but they weren’t ready for customers yet so we decided instead to meander the streets of Venice and head towards the Peggy Guggenheim Collection.

We took every twist and turn imaginable and stopped in numerous glass stores and mask and costume shops in the girls’ never ending quest to find the perfect souvenir.  They each have 50 Euros of their own from their birthday gift from their Great Aunt.  Its not as fun shopping in Italy anymore now that dollar is so pathetically weak, but kids don’t understand currency conversion so to them its all the same.  I hopelessly tried to indoctrinate them into the art of haggling, but that was no use.  They can’t help but look at something and say, “It’s only 20 Euros and I have 50!”  Try getting a deal after that loud proclamation.

Continue reading

Day 5 Venice!!! (Do not have blind faith in the GPS!)

A five-hour drive.  DVD player loaded, headphones on, ipods ready and the GPS set to Tronchetto Parking Structure in Venice.  We were all set.  We got out at about 8:30 am and took off north out of Tuscania.  The ride to get the A1 Autostrada was incredible.   Up the Etruscan hills through Montefiascone, towards Orvieto, it was one sea of sunflowers after another, rolling hills brimming with grape vines and olive trees with the lake glistening in the sun.  Our little Garmin Nuvi GPS prodded us along, usually correctly, sometimes choosing twisty-turniest path, sometimes leading us through the narrowest of cobblestone streets, but we arrived on the A1 eventually and then gunned it for Venice.

Say what you will about the slowness of Italians to get things done, but their roads are outrageously gorgeous.  The Autostrada is what every interstate in the US should strive to be.  They should put some of that shovel ready stimulus money towards building these kinds of roads in the US.  I don’t even like driving, but I can’t help but think this is the way to go.  And the rest stops!  Seriously, this is where we Americans truly fail.  In Italy the rest stop is a huge sprawling self service restaurant and buffet, with sandwiches and pizza, or the spread that consists of a salad bars, fresh fruit, pastas and risotto, meats cooked to order, an array of breads and espresso.  It cost a fortune, but it beat the nasty fast food we are used to on the road.

We were making great time on the Autostrada until we saw a sign for the turn off to Venice; our little Nuvi however said go on straight.  We chose to believe Nuvi.  Bad choice.  Continue reading

Living La Dolce Vita

Italy_map3 Three months ago while I was in the middle of preparing dinner my husband called from work and told me that he had been laid off.  You’d think in this economy I wouldn’t have been surprised, but the mass lay offs at his company had come in January and he had survived, so come April, and the brand new fiscal year, we thought he was in the clear.  As I slowly recovered from the initial urge to throw up he told me that his company had a very generous severance planned for him, as well as a three month “transition” time before he would be officially unemployed.  In other words, he lost his job but he was being given the gift of time.  At that point one thing was clear to me, we were going to get the hell out of here come June 30th and plan a trip – a long far away family summer trip.

It probably sounds ridiculous that in the midst of financial uncertainty my reaction was to plan a major vacation, but  there is one thing I’ve realized in the all of the career ups and downs we’ve been through and that’s that money comes and goes but time only goes by.  We’ve been through this before (pre-kids) when the dot com bubble burst and the company went bankrupt after working 80 hour weeks, including sleeping overnight at the office.  We took off for Japan and Thailand to recharge and get some perspective.  In 2001 we actually won a trip to China, but we were never able to take it first because of September 11th and then because my twin pregnancy was deemed too high risk for long flight travel.  We were officially grounded.

So now its been seven years since my daughters were born.  For the first 4 years we never went anywhere without them, and never for more than a week staying with family.  Fun, holiday vacations for sure but the kind of trips that work and school allow.  For the past two years my husband and I have gone away together for four days once a year.  The kind of trip that grandparent babysitting will allow.  So this chance, this opportunity to have an entire month if we wanted to take our girls and show them something of the world that their imaginations had yet to uncover seemed too priceless to pass up.  And things began to fall into place – camp refunded our money, extended family generously gave us a place to stay in Italy, we were able to use miles for one of our tickets.

When we told our daughters that this is what we were going to do – go to Italy for the month of July and explore the country, their first reaction was “What about camp?  We can’t miss color war!!!”  Guess what, we told them, camp will still be there.  The ability to have a whole month off to travel?  Well that may never come around again.  I don’t think they entirely get it yet, but they’ve been studying their Italian picture dictionary and reading Magic Treehouse books about Italy and starting to get excited because everyone around them is so excited for them.

And maybe its the fact that my girls are seven now that made this trip even more appealing.  Soon enough they’ll be going to sleep away camp and not wanting anything to do with us.  And they will have a way bigger say in how they want to spend their own time.  For now, time is a shared family expense, and if they can see the value in using that time to the fullest then I will at least feel like we provided for them in a less tangible but more meaningful way.   At the very least they’ll learn that when life gives you lemons you should make limoncello (or in their case some sorbetto limon)!

This post originally appeared at nycmomsblog

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