Really it is. For the past two weeks my real life has kicked my ass and I’ve watched as day after day my computer has functioned as a giant Twitter stream and email board. My writing, my real honest to goodness writing has taken a backseat to the whirlwind that swept through the month of September. It’s not that I haven’t been going to fabulous events or seeing friends or thankfully recording podcasts it’s just that my writing groove is hopelessly out of sync.
For a writer this state of non-writing is like being in a haze. I know my days are packed with important tasks, meetings and obligations but without real focused writing time I tend to feel untethered. What I’ve realized is that this new school year requires an entirely new schedule not just for my daughters but for me too. What I’ve also come to realize is that as I’ve piled on new projects and responsibilities I haven’t given up or delegated anything old so by default it’s my writing that has suffered. This is not OK.
I know I’m not alone in my stack of posts in draft mode, the events I attended that I still haven’t written about and the running mental conversations babbling through my brain at all times that I’m sure I will write down just as soon as I can. This is why blogging is hard. Maybe the hardest kind of writing I’ve ever done. Once you are established there is an expectation – from loyal readers and subscribers, from PR people who invited you to events and from your own nagging inner voice – that you must produce on a regular basis. I suppose for people who blog their everyday life or who can shoot out a quick 150 words this is no biggie. But for me, a girl who constantly edits, rewrites, is never happy with the final product and instantly wants to make another change the moment I hit “publish” the act of blogging is constantly stressful.
When I wrote fiction and screenplays (a lifetime ago) there was a different kind of investment in my writing time. There was a big picture I could feel my way through with an endpoint in mind. I loved spending time in whatever world was being created on the page, following characters, crafting dialog – telling a story so far outside myself. Having that final “THE END” was both mystifying and exhilarating. In contrast, a blog has no end. Every post leads to another. The characters? They are real. And the world? Well it’s not terribly escapist for me the writer.
So while I love my blog – and I really do – I have realized that every once in while I need a break: A blog-cation. As from any hiatus I have to hope I come back recharged and with a new perspective in the blogosphere. Or maybe I need a Twitter-cation instead – ’cause Twitter? That’s disgustingly easy.