A few months back I wrote a post called Mommy Blogger is Not a Dirty Word about the term “mommy blogger” being derisive but needing to claim it in order to take the power back to the moms. I had a huge response from that post both here, in real life and on Twitter. Mostly women want to be recognized beyond the label of Mom and Mommy and as the writers, bloggers and savvy business women they are. For brands and PR companies however they find the label useful because what they are after is the mom consumer demographic and what makes sense more than using mom bloggers to speak to real life moms? That’s fine. I get it. What I can’t stand however is PR or Marketing people, or talk show hosts for that matter, trying to win me over and show me empathy by saying the most patronizing phrase in the world, “Being a mom is the hardest job in the world.” YUCK.
This is the topic I’m harping on this week on our Blogging Angels podcast. But it goes even deeper than the condesension we talk about on the show. What bothers me most of all is that sure some days being a mom is hard, some days it downright sucks, and some days it’s really not that difficult at all but the thing is I don’t need someone nodding their head at me and trying to sell me on something by paying lip service to work of motherhood. What they’re trying to say of course is “I get you.” When all I want to ask them is “Really, what about it makes it the hardest job in the world? Is it because I don’t own your shiny new set of appliances? Or your fabulous floor cleaner?”
Here’s why being a mom is hard: You aren’t paid, you aren’t appreciated most of the time, you never know if you’re actually doing a good job, it can be physically and mentally exhausting especially in the beginning, your time is never your own again and it never, ever ends. OK. Some new iphone app or laundry detergent isn’t going to change any of that. And you know what? Women have been mothers forever. Some people are good at it and some people suck at it but there it is. In the end it has an intangible reward that cannot be quantified. I don’t need an outside person hyping it, promoting it or using it as a come-on – or god forbid a tagline.
You want to have a real discussion about motherhood being the hardest job in the world? Put away your swag and coupons and show me healthcare, childcare, public education, universal Pre-K and after school on the topic agenda. Then we’ll talk about how much you understand that being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Until then, retire that tired empty phrase and talk to me like the businesswoman you need me to be to work with you and your brand.